WALLACE: My boyfriend joined the Navy seven months ago. He is stationed in San Diego, California. We agreed that we would write to each other weekly and I have done that faithfully. My concern is that I no longer have any strong feelings for him. In fact, if he were to come home on leave, I wouldn’t really want to go out with him again.

I feel that I should write and tell him how my feelings have changed, but writing a “Dear John” letter to a guy in the military does not seem like a very patriotic thing to do. I need your help. — Ellie, Mesa, Ariz.

ELLIE: Patriotism has nothing to do with this. However, you do owe him the truth, so he knows how things are, and he can be free to date others. To give him false hope would be cruel. Write the letter today and wish him well.